super technique Ansel Adams once said you dont take an image you make it - and that before digital maybe he foresaw the future - just one alternative get rid of the high light and replace it with a dull colour this will brighten up the visual effect of red eye (no pun intended) I can see you intended it as a sun or suns but I think it pulls the eye

ken

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Ken

www.gemini1317.com

Dodging and burning are steps to take care of mistakes the lighting made in establishing tonal relationships.